Thursday, August 11, 2011

Marriage Check Up

“A man and a woman should choose each other for life,” said Dr. George Truett, “for the simple reason that a long life is barely enough time for them to understand each other – and to understand is to love.”

Understanding is the key to true love and intimacy.

Although it is a process, you can deepen and develop your relationship along the way. Sometimes, along the path, it’s good to stop and evaluate how you’re doing as a couple.

Good maintenance prevents major breakdowns.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself  concerning your marriage:

  • How can I best serve my partner?
  • Am I a good listener?
  • Do I really hear what my partner is saying, or am I busy thinking about how I am going to respond?
  • Can we disagree agreeably?  If not, what it is that causes us to argue?
  • Do I know what really pleases my partner?  Have I pursuing this?
  • Do I know what really annoys my partner?  Have I been doing this?
  • What are my dreams and hopes for our marriage?
  • What are yours?
  • How do we express our spirituality as a couple?  Are we satisfied with the present level of spiritual commitment?
  • What are we not doing that we ought to be doing?
  • What would it take to start doing it?
  • Have I been completely honest with my partner?  About the past?  About how I am feeling?  About my activities?
  • Are there any roadblocks to emotional intimacy in our marriage?  Do we know what they are?  Do we know how to get rid of them?
  • Have I been making selfish demands?
  • Am I willing to change?
  • Do we agree on money issues?  What can we learn from each other in this area?
  • Is there something wrong that needs to be confronted?
  • Is there something good that needs to be celebrated?
  • Do I need to take more responsibility for creating a healthy and happy home?
  • Am I willing to forgive?
  • Am I willing to deal with issues, rather than attacking or sulking in silence?
  • What three things can I do which would bring great joy to my partner?
[from Revitalize Your Church